There's a guy who owns a parrot which never talks. So he goes to the pet
shop to get some advice. The pet shop owner says he knows exactly what the
problem is. "Your parrot has too much hook in it's beak, what you have to
do is file its beak back and it will be able to talk just fine. You've got
to be careful not to file it too far though, because if you take too much
off the bird will drown the first time it has a drink." The parrot owner
asks how much the pet shop guy charges to do this beak modification and he
says $100. So the parrot fancier decides he'll do it himself.
A week or so later they bump into one another in the street. The pet shop
guy enquires how the parrot is and whether it is talking yet? The parrot
owner says, "The parrot is dead." Pet shop guy says, "I told you not to
file the beak back too far, did he drown when he had a drink?" Ex-parrot
owner says, "Heck no, he was dead before I got him out of the vice."
